There’s always room for Jell-O
Jello treat gets Jefferson Parish 4th-grader suspended
Gelatin gets 8-year-old suspended
Eight year-old Kelli Billingsley wanted to raise some money to buy Christmas presents. With mom’s help she made Jell-O cups and brought them to school to sell to her friends.
The youngster was suspended Nov. 29 from Geraldine Boudreaux Elementary School after school officials said the snacks given to her by her mother in small, clear plastic containers resembled an alcoholic mixture commonly known as “Jell-O shots,” said Jefferson Parish public schools spokesman Jeff Nowakowski.
The girl was suspended for nine days for two violations of the system’s drug policy: having a “look-alike” drug on school grounds and intending to distribute it, Nowakowski said.
Busted for posession and distribution of a sugary substance. The Jell-O was taken by the Jefferson Parish Sheriff’s Office. It was tested and contained no alcohol. This punishment really is for bringing Jell-O to school in small plastic cups. But it gets worse.
Under the drug policy, the girl can return to school Friday if she completes an assessment program, undergoes counseling and submits to a hair test to make sure she is drug-free, Nowakowski said.
An eight year-old girl who made Jell-O is being treated like a serious drug abuser. Posession of Jell-O requires an assessment program? Exactly what is it about gelatin that mandates counseling? Is there some established relationship between no-fat desert cups and drug abuse that I don’t know about? Any sort of connection that would make forcing Jell-O eaters to take hair follicle drug analysis tests seem anything besides absolutely ludicrous?
(Tip credit to Scotchman, Opinion Journal and Emma Huebner)
Louisana… Notice all this crap happens in the south. Crazy red necks.
Hey, I resemble that remark. Never forget that your friendly neighborhood ZeroIntelligence host is a Georgian.
It would be nice if we could indeed localize these incredible feats of stupidity but they really are an epidemic across all the states.
Louisana… Notice all this crap happens in the south. Crazy red necks.
That’s a pretty asinine remark, shadowhawk. Just a quick scroll down the home page today shows this kind of “crap” happening in California, Indiana, Missouri, New York and even Great Britain, as well as in southern states. It goes on all the time here in Michigan. As Jim pointed out, the insanity is not exclusive to the South.
I can’t believe there isn�t more outrage over things like this, more public attention.
The next generation is being programmed as non-thinking zombies who comply without question even if the rule is bad. They are being programmed to accept this ridiculousness and conform to a dangerous way of thinking.
What do you tell this 8 year old about why this is happening to her? What lesson is she to learn from this?
This is truly nuts, maybe High Schoolers would know these look like “shooters” but I doubt the vast majority of 8 y/o’s do.
Oh well, the school will loose funding for nine days of attendance. Also, what will the “Assessment Counsler” do when mom says “I made for my kid … neither I nor the kid knew about shooters.” If the counsler persists past that point - I say go after their license for child abuse.
Isn’t this also putting things in a really odd order? “Jell-O Looks like Jell-O shots.”
Imagine if art were the same way:
“That apple looks remarkably like a PAINTING of an apple!”
–adam
Time to sue Bill Cosby for pushing look alike items on minors. Now that I think about it he did seem drunk when he spoke.
Our children are being trained to be robots, but they most certainly are not learning to be ones. We are in a lot of trouble from all the angry kids that these zero tolerance rules are creating. The next american revolution will be on its way because so many of the so-called intelligent adults are so stupid and politicaly correct and liberal.
Evil girl suspended for bringing evil Jello…
What exactly is this sort of ridiculous crap teaching our kids? Nothing good, that’s for sure. And when exactly are people going to sue to get rid of these idiotic “zero tolerance” policies? Hopefully soon.
This looks like it ought to be a post from Scrappleface or the Onion. How can these people do this and not think they’re putting the cart before the horse?
If you have a coke, are you going to get suspended because it looks like a Jack & Coke? No fruit juice for you, missy, since fruit juice is a common mixer in alcholic beverages!
Come to think of it, that so-called sprite you’re drinking looks suspiciously like a Gin & Tonic.
In my best Rowe imitation.
“The only reason to bring jello to school is as a delivery device for drugs and to intimidate the cookies and ice cream”
Sorry couldn’t resist. On a more sarcastic note how did the administration know what the jello-shots look like if they aren’t slamming them in the lounge between classes.
The school will have to ensure that oregano, salt, and sugar are banned. No more dark clay in the art room lest the eight-year-olds start playing the “heroin” game. Turn off all the water fountains because water looks like vodka and gin; it also looks like a substance that can be found in a syringe. No more cola because it might be rum & cola. No more milk because it might be a white Russian. No more mushroom pizza. No more stickers of any kind (so no more gold stars for high achievement). Heck, no more cups because these can be used for every kind of booze.
Homer is correct– episodes like this say a lot about the minds of the administration. They must be Twelve Stepping.
I’ve been reading this site for a long time, and all I can say is that I’m glad I went to public school when I did (in the 70s and 80s). It’s beyond crazy and beyond reason, and these are precisely the people tasked with teaching reason.
Some poor kid in GA was suspended for ten days because she pretended that the grape juice she brought in the cafeteria was red wine. The jerks in her school knew it was grape juice and that it was sold to her in the cafeteria, but because she was joking around and pretending it was wine, that garnered her a ten days’ suspension.
Why would her mother even want her to back to that school and why would the girl want to?
For the rest of the story:
This occurred in the parish where I live. I have to admit I was appalled at the stupidity of the whole mess. But, the mom is a bartender and makes “real” jello shots at home to bring to work. The “fake” shots the girl brought to school for all practical purposes looked like the real thing, although I am not real sure what that means.
The rule that they used to bounce the little girl was it was a “look alike” substance. Under ZT rules it doesn’t have to walk like a duck, or even quack like a duck, it has to only look like a duck. It should be noted that just last week a group of would be drug dealers (in another state) were arrested for attempting to sell fake cocaine to undercover agents so there is some precedence for this rule.
Local news articles have reported several scenarios put forth by the mother as to the how and why the shots made there way to school, which I am sure only served to raise suspicions of the authorities. No mention has been made as to how the student was representing these fake shots to her friends and/or customers.
The matter was settled today, with a parent and administrator meeting, the little girl will have to have a hair analysis for drugs and mom will have to undergo 3 hours of counseling. Given the mother’s change of heart regarding the settlement there may have been more than enough blame and shame to go around on both sides.
PS for shadowhawk:
Either learn how to spell, learn how to use a spell checker or refrain from making stupid comments you should have been able to figure out for yourself were not true.
“Louisana… Notice all this crap happens in the south. Crazy red necks.
Posted by shadowhawk at December 8, 2004 04:06 PM”
Louisiana. There is an “i” between the s and a.
And by the way, red necks are not indigenous to Southern Louisiana. We have Cajuns, Creoles, American Indians, Spanish, French, Irish, Asians, Germans, Italians, Polish, probably people from every country of the world. We have whites, blacks, browns, yellows and greens (usually the result of too much time spent on Bourbon Street). We are a red state, like the rest of the South. But you already knew that didn’t you.
Cheers from the Big Easy
Check my blog for links to pics of the girl’s treats and pre-packaged Jello snack cups. (A direct link to the updated post is in the TrackBack window.)
The gelatin in jello in used for passing drug tests for smoking pot, the thc in pot sticks to your fat cells and when you pee the thc slowly drains out from your fat cells, drinking a glass of water with jello will coat the fat cells and produce a false negative on a drug test. Thats why they were given hair folicle tests.